Tuesday, January 31, 2012

He did it again, and other ramblings about Miller

Last Thursday Miller did it again.  He has split open his chin.  The one that had 16 stitches about 6 weeks ago.  He wasn’t doing anything wrong.  I have to make that clear from the beginning, because really it is easier to conclude that he was being naughty.  He slid down off a chair to look for something and as he spun around, he slipped and hit his chin on the edge of the chair and split it open.

For some reason I am very calm in an emergency.  This time I was just totally dumbfounded as to what to do.  ER, doctor’s office or plastic surgeon?  Only the ER was open because it was about 7 a.m. but I just didn’t want to go there again!

I called Allen and asked him to come home and as soon as he saw it, he was able to make the decision that we really needed to go back to the hospital. 

On the way there, the plastic surgeon’s office opened and we were able to speak with him and have him meet us at the ER.  Clever trick if you can pull it off. 

Miller saw “his” bed in the ER and said, “I been to that one before.”, so back he went to “his” bed in the ER.  That is so wrong, but it is what it is.

The plastic surgeon determined that it was just too messy down there to stitch it up.  He did his best to use Derma-Bond and butterfly strips to close it up, but he has an opening( about the size of 2 pieces of rice side by side) that it open and is going to have to heal up.

UGH!

He has done really well with not messing with it and we just have to watch him like a hawk! 

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That brings me to something that has been rolling around in my brain for a while.

Miller is hard to parent.  Part of it is that he is 3.  It’s not just that.  He is exceptionally busy.  He’s also really smart and athletic.  This gets him into situations he just shouldn’t be in.

Not too long ago he told me that he wanted a million dollars.  I told him that I was sure would have a million dollars one day {or a rap sheet}.  I feel like he will be a phenomenal success or not.  There won’t be much in between!

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Over and over I find myself in tears because I just don’t feel like I am doing it “right” with him.  What does he need to make him into a good boy?  I have prayed many times a day for as long as I can remember, asking God to help me be the kind of mother that he needs.  I just don’t know what that is.  What would I need to be a better mother for him?  Patience, energy, more patience…

Then today while we were at the plastic surgeon’s office he tells me that Miller really needs to stay home for the rest of the week.  It’s not that having him home is a hardship.  It’s just that when he can’t get dirty or wet and can’t ride a bike, scooter or even run, I am completely at a loss as to how to handle this. 

We have done hour after hour of playing Legos, watching TV and movies and watching videos on You Tube.  We did this about 6 weeks ago, remember?  When he doesn’t get enough exercise he starts having behavior problems.

Which brings me to the next thing the plastic surgeon said.  “is he unusually hyper?”  Um no.  Um yes.  Um yes and no.  He is very active and at the same time he can play independently with Legos for 30 minutes or more.  However if you leave him alone during those 30 minutes you may come back to find something like this DSC_0118DSC_0119DSC_0120DSC_0121or this.

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He said, “Maybe it is a good time to ask an expert.”  Um ok, but he is 3.  I know he means well, but I just don’t know.  I am the one with a degree in Early Childhood Education.  That degree has taught me that the age of 3 is too young to judge these things.  But still…

Then I came across this.  More for me to roll around in my brain.

Here’s to the moms whose children jump in fountains!  If you see one of us, be sure to give her a big smile and a pat on the back ( or bottle of wine).  She’s doing the best she can.

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4 comments:

  1. Cheers to you "my fountain divng, ER going, flour cleaning, poop swishing" friend! It is hard raising a child that is not "cookie cutter" but don't you think it is going to make us better people for going on this journey??
    Much love and much patience
    Kelly

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  2. Would you ever have believed that parenting would bring so much worry to you life? I'm sure the ER doctor meant well but he is your child and you know him so much better! And he is only three- much to early (in my questionable opinion- I have my own doubts how good I am at this parenting thing) to be making any judgements on that sort of thing.

    You will get through this time and someday laugh at how crazy your boy was! Or you will get through this time and someday laugh and exclaim how crazy your boy has always been!

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  3. hang in there girl! I read that article too and it was such great reminders that our job goes beyond raising "good" kids. Miss you all and hope for no more ER trips!

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  4. Your posts are just too precious and your pictures are BEAUTIFUL!!

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